When Will We Accept?

whatdoesittaketobeamerican

I think it was kind of expected. If a guy who uses continuous racist attacks in a completely public fashion, gets to become the President of The United States, rest assured all of those racist bastards out there, who have been holding their hate compressed within their chest, will most likely blow up and make a mess of things.

Walls have been painted, people pushed and harassed. Why is this happening? Why are there so many hateful things being said and done?

The #1 excuse is that Donald Trump won the election, but as I ponder on this, I find it hard to believe this is the root cause. Come on! These hateful people were hateful long before Mr. Trump even came into the scene. They may have exploded once the election was over, but this racism has been cooking for quite a while!

In a way, I am glad all of this racism has surfaced in a public manner. Because before all of this ordeal, I think the populace was of the idea that whoever felt racially mistreated was just being silly and most likely was suffering from low self esteem. I think it is pretty obvious now this is not a figment of our imagination…

Clearly we are facing a major problem with ignorance here. There are some individuals who are lacking some serious levels of civility.

I am going to be honest. I don’t like every single human being on this planet. There are some individuals who are just plain old annoying to me. I don’t wish them any harm, but I would rather not spend any time with them either. But if I do have to spend time with them, for whatever reason, I make it a point to do so with respect!

Clearly, some individuals out there will not follow the same easy guideline…

Come on, guys! We all know our rights end wherever everybody else’s commence. This should be common sense, right? Well, apparently not…

This is a tremendous opportunity for us, as human beings, to put an end to this nonsense once and for all. Since it is obvious that all of this hate, harassment, and bullying is taking place in our country, it is our responsibility now to address it!

Because it is not that we are Americans first. It is that we are HUMANS first!!! And we all deserve dignity, regardless of what other individuals, who just happen to look like us, may have done in the past.

Moving On…

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Like I said in my previous posts, it is time to forget about the elections and whatever we may think will happen. Clearly we were wrong in the outcome of the election so chances are we will also be wrong on what is to follow. Maybe Trump is a super amazingly brilliant president which completely obliterates all possibilities of chance and happenstance. Although we pretty much know the Republicans will say he was awesome while the democrats will say he was one of the worst. Just like Obama, but with the opposite parties in the previous sentence.

So what do I think the future holds for us? How could I know? All I can tell you that for sure in less than 2 weeks is Black Friday. The day when we get the best deals eeeeeeever! Except that we really don’t. Because Black Friday was awesome a few years ago, but recently it has become quite the piece of crap.

It now starts way earlier than Friday. Heck! Last I heard some stores are already on Black Friday! Doesn’t sound neither blackish nor Fridayish, doesn’t it? The fun of this madness is that ONLY during Black Friday you get the discounts. Not the whole month! Cheaters…

Plus prices are not what they used to be. I remember those days when I could buy all sorts of stuff with, really, not that much money. I mean, I would spend a lot, but for all practical purposes I would have had to spend twice as much. I think the last year when I was able to live that illusion was 2008. After that, it has been junkier and junkier. Not expecting this year to be any better, but rest assured this is not our political system’s fault.

On another note, and also coming up, is a new Star Wars movie! Titled Rogue One and hitting theaters in December 16, 2016, it promises to be yet another event to look for! Now, I don’t think this movie is being expected to be the mega block buster of all humanity. I mean, Episode VII was a life violator kind of event. Oh yes, you read well! Life Violator! And if you are one of those (like me) who had been waiting for way much more than 30 years for Episode VII to reach the light, you will agree December 18, 2015 was not just another day. And the movie did well (quite well, actually) so a good bunch of us Star Wars lovers were quite satisfied.

As opposed to when Episode I was released which felt like a merge between a dentist’s appointment and an intrusive male gonad study…

Pretty much everybody realizes that Rogue One has no way of causing the same effect as The Force Awakens. I mean, come on. We waited 33 blasted years for Episode VII!!!! That is 33 times more than we have to wait to see a new Star Wars movie. Truly impossible to generate that much furor.

So, to be honest, all I am hoping for is that it is good and enjoyable. It is from Disney, so I remain hopeful that they will do a magnificent job.

And then there is the Holidays. They are right here! Yes, I know that officially the Holidays doesn’t start until Thanks Giving. But if Black Friday can start in October and you can pretty much start buying Christmas ornaments at the same time you can buy a Halloween costume, it is pretty much evident that the Holidays are already here!

Lots of cool stuff ahead of us! Enjoy!

 

Did We?

godcries

For an entire year we have been wondering how is it possible that a man like Donald Trump was doing so well in the election process. At first we were certain he wasn’t going to last long. How could he? He was an aberration, right? But somehow he prevailed…

Back on those days, my republican friends would tell me that it was because of the “uneducated”. But they were ganging up on the guy and for sure his race would be over soon! We all now know how well that ended…

I do not remember exactly when it was that we started theorizing how the movie Idiocracy was on its path to becoming true. But I guess it doesn’t matter because now it is pretty evident we are actually characters within the blasted film! If you haven’t watched Idiocracy, you should. It will show you how it seems the human race is heading to a dark path where moronicity trumps intelligence. The premise is quite compelling, so needless to say I truly hope it never is the case…

It is very easy to see that it was dumbness what made America elect such an aberration of a fellow. I mean, don’t take me wrong. As a reality TV celebrity I think Trump does a great job! I watched a couple episodes of The Apprentice and must admit they were entertaining like heck. We were all wanting to see who was getting FIRED on a weekly basis. But there is a dinky little difference, I don’t know, like maybe a couple billion light-years worth, between being a reality TV celebrity and the President of one of the most powerful nations on this planet!

So right there it tells you! Some people watched Trump on his mesmerizing performance in a TV show and somehow reached the conclusion that “Hey! Look at how this guy fires people every week! If he could only run for president…”

How about Sponge Bob? Heck the little yellow sponge cartoon is hilarious! Clearly 4 years of his presidency should be fantastic! Right?

Nobody expected Trump to win because it didn’t make sense. I am certain we will be decoding this mess for eons!

But you know what? I am done with this election. It is time to heal so although I have a bunch of jokes pending, I may drop them and move on to something else.

Darkness

darkness

It’s done. Our next President will be Mr. Donald Trump. Although I haven’t had a chance to watch his acceptance speech in its entirety, it apparently was much more civilized than his past year long spectacle. Clinton and Obama have also conceded defeat graciously.

While all of this transpires, my Facebook feed looks so gloomy, the only plausible question is “How the hell did this happen?” If a fascinatingly large amount of people thinks Trump was an aberration of an individual to become president, how on Earth was he elected?

I think probably the most plausible explanation, in numerical terms, is that most republicans voted for the republican ideals and the party, not necessarily for Mr. Trump. Of course, then there is the fact that a ridiculous amount of people voted to keep the Clinton Dynasty out of the white house.

Not certain if that makes it better…

Whatever the case, the darkness seems to be prevalent. Some people have tried to rationalize how we should be positive. That might as well be our only hope at sanity, as nobody expects that this is going to be an amazing turn of events where all American’s lives are propelled through the roof in progress and harmonious peace. I think this is one of those cases where we need to re-break the bone so that it can heal in the “right” fashion.

And maybe that is what all of this is about. A few ligament tearing here and there, which when healed will leave us in a better position. And what is this soul drenching weight we are feeling in the pit of our chest? Well, what did you expect? We are talking about ligament tearing here! Of course it’s going to hurt like hell! Let’s hope it doesn’t get infected though…

The problem is that Mr. Trump never gave us a vision of greatness we could feel fantastic about. What he showed us was that he can be quite the bully and a fairly successful A-Hole. Without a mighty plan, might I add…

Now, it is possible this was just a show he was putting on to get the crown. You know, like when boxers meet a couple of days before the match. It looks like they are going to tear each other apart, but this is just part of the “fun”. It is even possible in real life some of these contenders are actually buddies!

And considering we have elected (once again) a “TV Star” (albeit we should probably agree to converge on plain old “celebrity”), chances are that showmanship is what he does best. Hey, it was all a show. We are good! Right?

I don’t even know what to say. In the upcoming months Trump will need to show us that he too can be a decent human being. And it will take some serious convincing because during the last year, that is far from what he portrayed.

Right now there is fear and lots of anxiety. Sure, the president is only one guy and a single cog within the complex machinery that is the government. But he is kind of an important one!

What happens next? Many have been asking the question. I think it is pretty certain the Saturday Night People will be able to write skits without much of an effort. How about everybody else? Nope! We will need to work our asses off! Even more when it is pretty evident the economy will most likely get into a recession soon.

Save all you can now! If today feels dark, it might be because it will soon be VERY rainy…

Parallels…

reincarnation

Well, the people has spoken and the guy who nobody thought could win the election just did so. How did this happen? Well, there are many theories and I am certain these will be studied centuries down the road in many History classrooms across the globe. Let us just hope that it will not be aliens, many thousands of years down the road, the ones asking the question: “What the heck happened here?” as they gaze into a completely obliterated , once fruitful, planet Earth.

Today I am afraid. Our new President has been compared to one of the most atrocious leaders in the history of the human race. Of course in my joke I go into suggesting they are both the same entity, but the truth is that I don’t believe in reincarnation. This gives me hope.

Because I think it is pretty obvious the atrocious Hitler was kind of a genius, whereas The Donald has just been quite the lucky dude. They may have both risen to power by employing not so politically correct techniques such as fear, racism and all sort of deplorable behaviors.

Now, I am not an expert in German history, but it is my impression that Hitler was an amazing orator, whereas Trump is hardly so. Trump is just a lucky guy who happened to be in the right place in the right moment. The people of the US want change and electing an ex-president’s wife can hardly be considered change. Instead of continuing the Clinton Dynasty, which didn’t prove to be that great of an idea when we continued the Bush Dynasty, was not really an option.

Now, it is possible that in the event that I ever get famous with this dinky little comic blog, I am going to get some heat because of the atrocious act of suggesting that Trump is Hitler’s reincarnation. But like I said, I don’t believe in reincarnation. Plus if reincarnation was real, clearly Hitler can’t reincarnate in another evil dude because according to one of reincarnation’s main tenet, you are supposed to move towards different experiences in order to reach Nirvana. Not the band, of course…

And then is the matter that we really don’t know if Trump will end up being an evil dude. In fact, I am pretty much certain not even himself knows what kind of president he will end up being!

Time will tell what the heck happens here, but my theory is that Trump will be one of the most weird presidents in the history of the nation. There will be change, rest assured. The term “Politically Correct” has been redefined. And of course the economy will plunge and somehow the republicans will find that it was the democrat’s fault. But hey, insanity is not meant to be sane…

 

 

Election Day 2016

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Some day in the future (probably in August 27, 2117 like at 1:32 PM – not certain if it will be raining or not, though), a student somewhere in this planet will be wondering why was it that the elections of 2016 were considered to be so controversial. Although it is very possible that this is just the first of many more to come and even more controversial elections, in which case that same student will be asking “what was the author of comicups thinking when he wrote that post on November 8, 2016???”

In my defense, I am not alone. I think that in fact, my train of thought is as universal as the extent of the internet in our globe at the time of this century. In other words, if you have access to a computer connected to the net, chances are you are excitedly (as well as panickly) waiting to see what the heck happens today.

The entire planet is waiting for the result of our election. Because it may be that some people no longer think we are the first power on the world as we used to be. But whereas that is the truth or not, a power we remain. And whatever we do, tilts the axis of this planet. Or I should say, it tilts the axis of the human race. As it turns out, you do not need to be the first power to cause this reaction. Just being one of the first three seems to have the same effect.

And so today the people of the US will choose what the next 4 years will represent to the great extent of the human race. If you are voting, no pressure! Because it is not like this problem has a solution. The next four years are expected to be either bad or really bad. But I think the consensus is that we are hosed. Albeit the actual adverb mostly utilized starts with the letter “F”…

Happy Election Day! And may the next FOUR be with us…

Workaholics

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A few months ago, Marissa Mayer, Yahoo’s CEO, “blessed” us with the secret recipe on how to be successful. How lucky are we! Not only that, instead of reading entire tomes of knowledge it can all be summarized into a single sentence:

“Work 130 hours a week.”

Really! Is that it? Do I need a PhD or to learn tricks on how to scam the system as well as the less mentally endowed? Man, if I had only known this simple technique at a younger age…

On her defense, she does mention it is not just about the 130 hours, it is also how you employ them. Because spending too much time in the toilet reading comics such as this one, or browsing facebook, is really not a well utilization of you 130 hours. You actually have to plan your bowel movements, so screw nature! You are in control now! I mean, if you want to be successful, that is.

The preposterous here is not that you need to plan bathroom visits to enhance your chances of becoming successful. The ridiculous and nonsensical notion, is our definition of “successful”!

Because a few thousand years ago, being successful was about securing enough meals to ensure the survival of yourself and your family. Yet somehow, as we became a more advanced civilization, success started being measured with how many mansions you have (as well as how big and luxurious said mansions are), the number of yatchs and boats, fancy cars, horse stables, and all of the luxuries you can possibly amass.

How about being able to enjoy from a lovely picnic with your family during a warm summer day? Well, if you can’t enjoy from a long and relaxing session of #2, I suppose a picnic is out of the question…

We have truly become a twisted life form when we consider success is not about living a life of quality but amassing crap we truly don’t need. And here in the United States we have become quite good at twisting this nonsense even further!

Capitalism may seem like the best way to ensure individuals have a ticket to success. But which success? The one where I have to work insane hours so that I can rub on my neighbors that I have a higher acquisition power? Or the one where I can spend half of my time having fun playing video games with my six year old, building a wooden boat with him and them watch our creation sail away on a nearby creek, or simply take a break and enjoy from a family day at the museum?

We truly have lost it if we think success is about how many luxuries we can amass.

Do yourself a favor and remember the main pleasures in life are:

  1. Eating
  2. Sleeping
  3. Sex

and let’s not forget

4. Taking a dump!

Notice, that intriguingly, EVERY SINGLE ONE OF THESE are crucial for life. And A Ferrari, essential for life IT IS NOT!

 

Great Again…

americupsgreatagain

I am intrigued by how a simple slogan such as “Make America Great Again” can trick people into just assuming that America is this Hell Hole which needs improving. Curiously, as we set to make America great again, it is pretty clear we are making it really bad in the process. The irony!

Because there is no doubt that racial tension, bigotry and hate has truly been exacerbated in the last year or so. After all, if a presidential candidate can be the ultimate A-Hole, why can’t I too be an A-Hole?

What makes this slogan even more intriguing is that some of the plans to make America Great Again have to do with keeping immigrants out of our country. Why is it that Immigrants are coming into our country in the first place? Seems to me that if this was such a Hell Hole, it would be us fleeing, not the immigrants rushing in.

But hey! There is tons and tons of pieces of paper, vinyl, stickers and all the plausible paraphernalia printed with the words “Make America Great Again”, so the only possible conclusion must be that America was once awesome but not anymore. Oh! Who could save us…

I mean, anybody could argue that the words “Make America Again” are just a lie and a ploy to make somebody else’s bank account GREAT, AGAIN! But where is the evidence for this claim? It hasn’t been written in paper, so it must not be true…

As one of my heroes, Genius Astrophysicist Dr. Neil Degrasse Tyson, said recently:

“Let’s Make America Smart Again!”

Dangerous Hate

ihateyouall

I am not entirely certain whether I should be panicking or not. I guess there is no point in panicking yet as the elections are not even through, but the fact that we have a guy who has been compared to Hitler getting so close to being elected, is not a trivial matter!

Now, we have to be cautious here. Eight years ago, Obama was being tagged as the antichrist and we all know nothing bad actually happened. That could of course be because there is no (an never will be an) antichrist and fearing such a creature would be similar to fearing the Big Bad Wolf.

Nonetheless, Obama was feared to be one of the most cataclysmic presidents in the history of the human race, and truly, what happened? Obamacare? Is that it? Man, if that’s Armageddon, bring it on!

I know there is plenty of people that hate Obama to the core and they consider the poor guy an horrendous human being when in reality all I have to do is compare him with Hitler to see Obama was yet another president. And I think every single president has been hated by whoever decided to hate him.

And whatever president happens to get elected this upcoming Tuesday November 8, 2016 will also be hated. And will also be loved! By how many, though… And by who? Key questions!

What I am hoping for is that if Trump does win and goes crazy, the country will not let him become a fearsome dictator. If we do let him win, it is crucial we remember this!

Because it is very easy to say “What the heck man! How on Earth can that happen today and in the US, no less??? You are crazy!”

But something tells me this is history repeating itself and that is precisely what the Germans said in the 1930’s…

Careful, Americans! If we are not careful, soon it may be time to truly make America Great Again!

Locker Room Talk

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I am completely blown away by the history we are “in the making” of. For way less, anybody in the upper echelon would have been made to pay. Somehow, none of that matters when it comes to Trump. The guy can insult, and do all sorts of heinous things. And a mere two days before the election he still has a chance to win the presidency! How could this be? In the meantime, Hillary gets squashed by the kind of things that anybody would and should get squashed for.

The intriguing thing about this election is that we have two candidates with some nasty skeletons on their closet. Curiously, one is made to pay for them and the other one is cruising through his own backyard cemetery!