A few months ago, Marissa Mayer, Yahoo’s CEO, “blessed” us with the secret recipe on how to be successful. How lucky are we! Not only that, instead of reading entire tomes of knowledge it can all be summarized into a single sentence:

“Work 130 hours a week.”

Really! Is that it? Do I need a PhD or to learn tricks on how to scam the system as well as the less mentally endowed? Man, if I had only known this simple technique at a younger age…

On her defense, she does mention it is not just about the 130 hours, it is also how you employ them. Because spending too much time in the toilet reading comics such as this one, or browsing facebook, is really not a well utilization of you 130 hours. You actually have to plan your bowel movements, so screw nature! You are in control now! I mean, if you want to be successful, that is.

The preposterous here is not that you need to plan bathroom visits to enhance your chances of becoming successful. The ridiculous and nonsensical notion, is our definition of “successful”!

Because a few thousand years ago, being successful was about securing enough meals to ensure the survival of yourself and your family. Yet somehow, as we became a more advanced civilization, success started being measured with how many mansions you have (as well as how big and luxurious said mansions are), the number of yatchs and boats, fancy cars, horse stables, and all of the luxuries you can possibly amass.

How about being able to enjoy from a lovely picnic with your family during a warm summer day? Well, if you can’t enjoy from a long and relaxing session of #2, I suppose a picnic is out of the question…

We have truly become a twisted life form when we consider success is not about living a life of quality but amassing crap we truly don’t need. And here in the United States we have become quite good at twisting this nonsense even further!

Capitalism may seem like the best way to ensure individuals have a ticket to success. But which success? The one where I have to work insane hours so that I can rub on my neighbors that I have a higher acquisition power? Or the one where I can spend half of my time having fun playing video games with my six year old, building a wooden boat with him and them watch our creation sail away on a nearby creek, or simply take a break and enjoy from a family day at the museum?

We truly have lost it if we think success is about how many luxuries we can amass.

Do yourself a favor and remember the main pleasures in life are:

  1. Eating
  2. Sleeping
  3. Sex

and let’s not forget

4. Taking a dump!

Notice, that intriguingly, EVERY SINGLE ONE OF THESE are crucial for life. And A Ferrari, essential for life IT IS NOT!


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